This Can’t Be Real Life

Le Sigh. Let me tell you what happened to me Tuesday night.

But first, let me give you a little bit of background. I completely hate my apartment complex. If you can imagine any problem that you could have with an apartment, I have had it. I’ve had an infestation by a colony of mice, ginormous furry spiders descending on me from my ceiling, flying ants, water leaks,  dinosaur sized roaches, power outages, cabinets falling off of the walls, extremely creepy neighbors, and the icing on the cake: my kitchen ceiling caving in.  I moved to Philly sight unseen (I do NOT recommend that you do this. EVER) because I got a new job and literally had to drop everything and move there within four weeks. The apartment complex had beautiful pictures online, claimed that it was eco-friendly, and that my unit was newly renovated. In reality, they are complete slumlords that make their money off of unsuspecting people moving in that break their leases a few months later at a ridiculously high cost to high tail it out of there because of all of the craziness that occurs there.

So, back to Tuesday night. Around 10 pm I was laying on my couch watching Youtube and drifting into a really nice sleep when I started to hear a sound that was similar to static electric. I had been hearing this sound all week but could not figure out where it was coming from. My apartment is located directly over the boiler room of the apartment complex, so I figured that it was just some machine making a noise. A few minutes later, I heard a noise that was similar to in the movies when they turn an electric chair on. A really high voltage like sound.  This continued for a few seconds. Next, I started hearing popping sounds. Then there was an explosion and the lights went out.  I looked out my window and saw that my building and the building next door did not have power.  I fumbled around in the dark to find my flashlight and my shoes. When I turned on my flashlight, I realized that my apartment was quickly filling with smoke from the basement.  I grabbed my keys and my bag, a folder filled with all of my important documents, unplugged everything and ran out into the hallway. My neighbor was in the hallway as well and said that her apartment was filling with smoke too.

I went to call 911 but of course I forgot to grab my phone so I went outside and asked someone to dial 911 because there was an explosion in the basement.  All of the tenants in the apartment complex started to file outside and were sitting on the steps in front of my apartment in their pajamas and wondering what had happened. They sent five fire trucks, police, an ambulance, and a police helicopter.  I had to let the firefighters into the building to check my apartment, so I was able to go back and get my phone.  It turns out that my landlords/slumlords had all of the power lines in both buildings connected to one solitary power source in the boiler room under my apartment. With everyone running their air conditioners due to the unusually hot weather, the circuits got overloaded and literally spontaneously combusted.

Around 1am, our property owner showed up and let us know that everything was under control and that the power would be restored by morning. In the meantime, they had set up a Red Cross disaster center at a local school with cots and food so that we could go to sleep there and then return in the morning when the power was back on.  Well, we got to this supposed disaster center and all they had for us were some hard metal chairs and some pringles and coffee. No food and no beds. Around 4am they told us that it was safe to go home.

The whole 6 hours that this was happening, I kept saying out loud “This can’t be real life. This can’t be real life.” It was literally like a scene out of a movie. I have never had something that crazy happen to me before.  I will be moving out on Monday. I can’t take anymore of this foolishness. My new apartment is wonderful and I will share more about it when I move. Now, if you will excuse me, I have a scathing google review to write about my apartment complex.


2 thoughts on “This Can’t Be Real Life

  1. i cannot believe this!!!! it IS straight out of a movie. and slumlord is the perfect term for whomever your landlords are. i cannot believe all this crap has been going down for so long! i started hyper ventilating when you said giant hairy spiders. i have never seen one in real life, and the very thought makes me want to vomit. $%(@#%$T(URW*#U$*#)

    so glad it was close enough to your move that you didn’t have to endure it much longer. and i wonder who was responsible for that fake crisis center? yikes.

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